I bet you came to this post because like me you have questions. You’ve probably seen countless hash tags on women supporting women or women being stronger together.
But again when you look around there’s an overwhelming number of women tearing down other women. It is even possible that you are a victim or you’ve done something that broke another woman. But like all of us you are camped here wondering why.
Well let’s have that conversation.
You’ve heard people use phrases like girls are socialised to be this and that.
In Uganda for example from a tender age girls are taught to be ware of other girls. We are told that other women are out to get us and it is wise for us to be a head of them. You will often hear people say things like “women are their worst enemies” or a senga advising her daughter to “keep her man” away from her friends because women don’t wish each other well. So as we grow we internalize these “morals” and this causes us to mistrust other women or even go to the extremes of tearing them down. More like strike before you are struck down.
Collaboration over competition
Comparison is the thief of joy
I honestly didn’t plan on posting a drag blog post but I definitely came for your edges. Let’s face it, women are probably the most self centered and attention seeking people you’ll meet (from personal observation). So when you find two women in the same space and one is often more centered the other starts to “feel a mango” (jealous). We have seen this with our celebrities every time there is an upcoming artist doing the damn thing. Self centeredness is a harmful trait that we all have to be intentional about unlearning. We need to understand that another person’s shine does not in any way dim your own.
Hurt people hurt people
This should have been up there. Again because most people don’t prioritize their mental health we often have people moving into rooms with all their baggage and unresolved trauma. You will find that most times people’s response or how they treat others has a lot to do with their personal experiences as opposed to anything about the other person.
The power of Social media
Need to fit in – CLICKS
I will not go so much into these because if you know me you definitely know how I feel about bandwagon. I have honestly never understood why a group of women would come together just to tear down another woman just for the fun of it. Like I like to say – people need help. And most times, really it’s just a projection of our insecurities onto another person. There’s something about hating people because they have what we could never have. I find the whole concept of this weird honestly and we should all work on doing better.
It’s not that DEEP
There are women that tear down other women in what they assume or pretend to assume are jokes. Such people will often hit you with the “why are you so sensitive” or “it’s not that deep” line after they do something you consider trash. I am personally very careful with the jokes I make around particular people because what is funny to me might not be funny to them because of their experiences. For example if someone told me to stop eating too much because I might gain weight it would not be the same as telling that to a plus size person who has to deal with countless people telling her to starve.
This is why it’s important for us to be kind and considerate because what is not deep for you might be deep to someone else.
That’s just about it from me guys. I hope you enjoyed reading this.
Please share your thoughts with me in the comment section
Belows of love 💜
©Tales of a Curious mind